MEMPHIS, Tennessee — Jeremy Harrell is not only a father of his biological son and two girls he adopted – but a former public service worker who believes the Supreme Court’s historical decision to reverse Roe v. Wade makes his mission more critical.
Curly-haired Ruby was adopted by the Harrell family officially in 2021.
Like many families who make the life-changing decision – the adoptive process came with hurdles.
“From the time we started our home study, to the time they finalized, our adoption in court took about three years," said Harrell. "There would be a number of things during that process where I would just ask the question, why do we do this, this way?”
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After previously doing policy work in former Gov. Bill Haslam’s office and also with Sen. Lamar Alexander, it was those questions that led Jeremy to get involved and eventually create the Adoption Project.
“How do we make it easier and more efficient, safe and ethical? How do we address and work in the foster care system, where we are reducing the number of kids who aged out?"
Harrel said for many adoptive families the cost of adopting is a major barrier, and additionally a perhaps unnecessarily long process.
"It is a really big deal to terminate parental rights (TPR) and we have to be sure that when we're pursuing TPR it is in the child's best interest," Harrel explained. "That said, unnecessary delays in the TPR process can create significant barriers to permanence for the child and their prospective new family."
The project also focuses on providing resources for the birth parents.
“We collectively have this notion of like somebody's just they're giving their baby away," explained Harrell. "But that's really not what's happening. They're making a really difficult decision, it's really hard for them in the best what they feel like is the best interest of that child.”
Ruby’s mom chose to keep an open relationship agreement with Ruby's adoptive family, with them sharing photos weekly.
The Adoption Project also helps birth parents find mental health resources if needed.
“They just kind of get left with the rest of the things that got them there in the first place and now we've layered this grief on top of it,” Harrell explained.
Ruby’s birth mom chose the Harrell family a second time – asking them to adopt Ruby’s half-sister, Rosie.
Harrell and his wife couldn’t say no, wanting both sisters to have a life with more opportunities.
“If that's the case, in order to get there, they (sisters) had to lose the closest first connection they ever had, and so there's a lot of trauma for that child.”
Trauma everyone is working to heal.
“We see it in our girls, and we'll continue to see it going forward, we'll help them work through it will continue to build that relationship with their, with their birth mom.”
Studies show children who never get adopted while in foster care have a 20% chance of becoming homeless and boys aging out face a 60% percent chance of jail time in five years.